Jagged and torn remnants of horn
bleed at my fingertips
a welcome pain.
present and now and physical.
Instead of erroneous, floating, dissociative
and thoughts of
I have lain in this darkness too long.
I have been beyond caring- but not,
only powerless and defeated and full of
Lost in this darkness
darker than my soul's darkest night.
than the void itself.
I have known my heart to harden and then
and crystalize into piercing shards.
Never before have I known it to wither
and shrivel and fade to mere
To feel the hollow emptiness echo in me...
and to dream of diving headfirst into that void
where once a heart beat-
to surrender to the nothing.
That grace is not given me.
So I begin this dreadful climb
and welcome the pain and blood as hand by hand
I reach and claw and pull